Issue #7: "I Answered That Question Completely Wrong."
October 2014. Grace Hopper Conference.
Satya Nadella, barely eight months into running Microsoft, is onstage at the world's largest gathering of women in tech. Someone asks what women should do if they're uncomfortable asking for a raise.
Obviously he nailed it, right? I mean, he just became CEO of one of the largest companies in the world.
Well… not so much.
"Have faith that the system will give you the right raises. That's good karma."
Yeah… that's what he actually said. At a women's conference. About pay equity.
The room went silent. Twitter erupted. And somewhere, a PR team collectively double-tapped for another whiskey.
This could have been a massive disaster. Cue the classic play-it-off, double-down, “Foot in Mouth” protocol.
Instead, within hours, Nadella sent a company-wide email:
"I answered that question completely wrong."
No spin. No “what I meant to say.” No blaming jet lag or context or the patriarchy he accidentally endorsed.
Just: I was wrong.
Then he did something most CEOs — frankly, most leaders — never do.
He shut up and listened. He met with women's groups in tech. He asked questions. He learned. He evolved.
That moment of humility — admitting he epically face-planted in front of millions — didn’t just save his reputation. It became the foundation for a cultural shift that helped transform Microsoft from a $300 billion company into a $2 trillion powerhouse.
Turns out “I don’t know” is more profitable — and more honest — than “trust the system, ladies.
From Chapter 7 of The Business Buffet
🧂Humble Leaders Win (And Arrogant Ones Kind of Suck)
Let’s stop pretending humility is a soft skill or a personality quirk. It’s not.
It’s learned. Intentional. Strategic.
It’s also a competitive advantage.
Research shows that humble leaders build more motivated, creative, and resilient teams — the kind that actually speak up, solve problems, and stick around. And the kind you actually want.
They create cultures where learning beats ego, mistakes aren’t career-limiting, and everyone’s strengths get airtime.
That’s not soft. That’s smart.
While arrogance might get you in the room, humility is what keeps people from actively plotting your downfall between Teams calls and happy hours.
It’s also what keeps you grounded, curious, and growing.
It goes hand-in-hand with self-awareness — an all-too-lacking trait for many in positions of power.
Real humility doesn’t mean playing small. It means having the confidence to admit what you don’t know, the awareness to value others' contributions, and the openness to keep learning.
🧠 Why Humility Works
And here’s the best part: it doesn’t just help your team. Humble leaders are more likely to be trusted, mentored, promoted, and respected over the long haul.
Because people don’t follow perfect. They follow real.
Self-Awareness Beats Self-Promotion Humble leaders recognize both their capabilities and their limitations, leading to better decisions. When you communicate with genuine humility, you create space for honest self-reflection. Which means you actually learn from mistakes instead of reinforcing your soapbox.
Trust Is the Only Currency That Matters A meta-analysis in the Journal of Organizational Behavior found that humble leadership bridges hierarchical gaps and strengthens bonds across all levels. Translation: people will run through walls for you instead of daydreaming about locking you in the supply closet.
Curiosity Compounds Faster Than Ego Harvard Business Review research shows that curious, humble leaders actively listen to their teams, creating environments where knowledge flows freely. Satya Nadella didn’t just apologize — he shifted Microsoft’s entire culture from know-it-alls to learn-it-alls.
🍴Try a Bite This Week
Humility is a practice. And like any practice, it gets stronger with small, repeatable behaviors.
Things like active listening, asking for feedback, or simply saying “I was wrong” out loud. These aren’t dramatic acts. They’re daily reps that shift you from self-focused to other-aware. The kind of shift your team feels before they can name it.
Try one of these this week and see what honesty, vulnerability, and discomfort can earn you:
🍴 The "I Don't Know" Challenge For one week, acknowledge uncertainty at least once per day. Say it directly — then follow with “I’ll find out” or “What do you think?” Watch how quickly your team starts bringing you real insights instead of nodding while silently updating their LinkedIn profiles.
🍴 The Credit Catapult In your next team meeting, highlight an unsung hero. Skip the generic “great job, team!” cheerleading. Be specific. Pinpoint exactly how someone’s contribution moved the project forward — and watch morale take off.
🍴 The Feedback Fishing Expedition Ask for improvement-focused feedback from someone junior to you. Not the sanitized “you’re doing great” version. Get real insights about a particular project or behavior. Then — and this is key — show real appreciation for the feedback, especially when your instinct is to get defensive. (They're probably right.)
💡A Final Thought
Humility doesn’t make you weaker. It makes you wiser.
The leaders who pretend they have all the answers stop learning. Their teams stop trusting. And their influence plateaus while they’re still explaining why their strategy would have worked if everyone else had just executed better.
The leaders who admit what they don’t know? They keep growing. Their teams lean in. Their impact compounds.
Thinking you have the answer all the time leaves no space for your growth — and no space for your team.
Turns out, the strongest thing you can say isn’t necessarily “I know.” It might just be: “Help me understand.”
🌶️ Add Your Spice
What's your most memorable "I don't know" moment—the kind that gained trust instead of losing it? Share it in the comments. Your story might be someone's lightbulb.
And if this resonated, share it with someone who’s just curious enough to appreciate it.